Tag Archives: He Threw the Last Punch Too Hard

Photographer Douglas Kirkland crosses us over the finish line for He Threw the Last Punch Too Hard book

Every year in January, I head to Photo LA, and have been doing this since the 90’s. While walking around and looking at the photographs, exhibitions, and books, I was dreaming that one day I would be able to take my lifelong love of books and photography and combine those loves to create books of my numerous and varied projects.

On January 18, 2014, I waited in line with dozens of people, who were waiting to get a signed copy of Douglas Kirkland’s December 16, 2013 recently released book, “A Life in Pictures : The Douglas Kirkland Monograph”. For all my photography friends, you know who Douglas is. For others, you may not know his name but you know his photographs. Yes, the iconic photograph of Marilyn Monroe draped only in a white sheet, was created by Douglas as Marilyn drank Dom Perignon and listened to Frank Sinatra. Not to mention many classic photographs such as Elizabeth Taylor, Robert Mitchum, Dustin Hoffman, Judy Garland with a tear rolling down her cheek, Audrey Hepburn smiling looking as if she has a secret, Ann Margaret on a motorcycle and Cher on roller skates in 1979. This legendary photographer’s book is a manifesto of his whole career. It’s his journey from a passionate teenager in Canada taking photographs with his box camera, and following his dreams to the twenty something photojournalist who worked for Life and Look magazine and had the guts to to ask Elizabeth Taylor, who was the world’s leading lady actress, if he could photograph her. He was the only photographer invited to the 1983 Michael Jackson Thriller shoot.

Douglas’s story is about the passion of a young man, the drive, dedication and hard work of following your dreams. Even though he heard comments like “Doug, I think it’s time you should start settling down and forget all this New York photography stuff”, he listened to his heart not family and friends. He is a living legend but bigger than the legend is his heart of gold.

As I made my way to the table where he was sitting, I told him about the project I was working on for 5 years. He had written in his book that a friend of his had told him that if you wanted to contact someone that you really respected , you should write a series of very earnest letters expressing your feelings for their work and your desire to meet them and that you would get through to them. Douglas wrote to Irving Penn three times before he received a response. He ended up with a job working for Mr. Penn.

After Douglas signed my book, I handed him my 1961 Rolleiflex 2.8F and asked him to make a photo of me. Then, I asked if he would look at my project on my mother who has brain damage from domestic violence, which was called “Forgiveness and Compassion” at the time. I asked him if he could help me. He handed me his business card and told me to write to him. I wrote him an earnest, heartfelt letter and six months later I was in his Hollywood Hills home along with his beautiful wife, Francoise. On his coffee table and book shelves was the biggest photography book collections I had ever seen. He spent two hours carefully looking at all my porfolios I had brought and told me when he saw “Forgiveness and Compassion”, “when you make a book on this project, I will buy one.”

Douglas helped cement my belief that you have to ask for what you want. I wrote to him three times about my Kickstarter campaign. After writing to him two times in the last month, I knew I hadn’t heard from him because he was working and it turns out him and his wife were in Rome for the premiere of his documentary “That Click” the night before!

At 3:13am, I received an email from Francoise telling me “I think you have reached your goal, Greetings from Rome. We are at the film festival presenting the documentary about Douglas “That Click” premiered last night, was a triumph.” Douglas and Francoise had generously backed my project, pushing it to its goal!

Not only did I begin photographing nearly 5 decades ago, but I have succeeded in my first Kickstarter backing successfully. I am partnering with FotoEvidence, who gave me the honor of a finalist award in the first FotoEvidence W (Women) Award. FotoEvidence is a publishing house that creates photo books to draw attention to human rights violations, and assaults on human dignity wherever they may occur. As a side note, my book editor,Régina Monfort, worked for Irving Penn for seven years.

By photographing my mother for ten years, I laid the ghost. It feels like poetry that Douglas Kirkland, the man who succeeded beyond his wildest dreams in his dream of being a photographer, and taught me to keep trying and never give up, brought my Kickstarter to the finish line with a generous backing. This story is for all the dreamers. Keep going and the longer it takes, it just means the project isn’t ready yet. Don’t give up your dreams, ever. Being able to tell my mother’s story feels as if a weight is lifted from my soul. I’ve been carrying this around since I was nine years old. One of my writing teachers, Joyce Maynard taught me to “write like you’re an orphan.” That’s one of the aims of this book, to tell the truth.

Photograph of Hannah Kozak at Photo LA, January 18, 2014 created by Douglas Kirkland with Rolleiflex 2.8F and expired Kodak Portra 400 film.

Here is the iconic photograph that Douglas Kirkland made of Marilyn Monroe in 1961, a year before her death.

Here is the first set up at the shoot with Marilyn Monroe. I always loved this photograph of Douglas. It shows the spectacular and brilliant angle he used to photograph Marilyn Monroe.

Raquel Welch, 1969 © Douglas Kirkland

Douglas Kirkland spent a month touring with Judy Garland & created this iconic photo in 1961.

Douglas met Audrey Hepburn when she was nearly 40. This famous photo is a promotional still for her 1966 heist movie “How To Steal A Million” by Douglas Kirkland, Paris 1965

The exceptional lenticular cover design of the Douglas Kirkland “Michael Jackson: The Making of Thriller” book

I love what Douglas captured here as Michael is behind the scenes during the making of “Thriller

Michael Jackson behind the scenes during the making of “Thriller”

Douglas creates magic moments during the making of “Thriller”

Michael Jackson with make-up artist, Rick Baker.

Insert showing autograph from Douglas Kirkland on his “A Life In Pictures” book:

The inscription Douglas wrote on January 14, 2014 at Photo LA. Even his handwriting is poetic.

If you want to study one of the great masters of photography, this is a great book to do so. Douglas Kirkland’s 7 pound masterpiece: “A Life in Pictures”

Michael Jackson: The Making of “Thriller” 4 days/1983

Douglas Kirkland’s written words to me on his “Michael Jackson: The Making of Thriller 4 days/1983” book with inscription Douglas Kirkland wrote at his home in the Hollywood Hills – 19 June 2014

Love the unusual composition Kirkland choose to make the photograph of me.

Mr. Kirkland signing my copy of his incredible book.

Douglas Kirkland poses for me at Photo LA.


My Mother’s Dolls part 3

My Mother’s Dolls part 3

This project began organically in December 2009 as a way for me to get to know the mother I truly never knew. The camera brought me connection and separation, all at once. I was given the gift of intuitive observance and another gift of recording that observance. I learned to be bold and vulnerable simultaneously. Eight years later, I am continuing my photo essay on my mother called He Threw the Last Punch Too Hard. It’s as if the project took on a life of its own once I started. I sometimes wonder if genetic memory of being a second-generation Holocaust survivor triggered my need not only to recognize but also to spend years of my life creating photos, editing those photos and turning this project into a book, to help tell this story of a social injustice — domestic violence — about which more stories need to be told.

I dreaded being indiscreet, but invading my mother’s and my privacy was the only way to tell this story. I am sharing my mother with the larger audience because eventually publishing a book on her story would be a small victory. She instills such hope in me. I am witness to her heart and her immense reservoir of compassion for humanity. Her entire being is imbued with the quiet principles of spirituality: living in the moment, being non judgmental, forgiving, and kind.

My father used to tell me that what happened to his family and the Jews in Europe in World War II could easily happen again. So I question everything and that’s part of my storytelling aim as a photographer: questioning and sharing. We are only here for a short time so part of my goal is to create something positive for humanity. I love photography because each person will interpret an image through their own individual eyes. Ernest Hemingway said we should write hard and clear about what hurts. I believe this translates to all art forms. This blog is part three of My Mother’s Dolls. It’s an edit of my mother with various dolls she loves, that keep her company day and night.

© hannah kozak

May 16, 2014

© hannah kozak

26 May 2014

© hannah kozak

23 Nov 2014

© hannah kozak

8 December 2014

© hannah kozak

8 March 2015

© hannah kozak

4 April 2015
After moving into new facility.

@ hannah kozak

17 April 2015

@ hannah kozak

23 April 2015
With Olivia and baby Olivia

@ hannah kozak

13 June 2015

@ hannah kozak

14 June 2015

@ hannah kozak

19 June 2015

@ hannah kozak

22 June 2015

@ hannah kozak

12 July 2015

@ hannah kozak

12 July 2015

@ hannah kozak

22 July 2015

As a bittersweet sidenote, I was awarded the Julia Margaret Cameron Award, 6th Edition, 1st Prize – single Documentary photo from my series on my mother —
He Threw the Last Punch Too Hard.

This project also made it to the finalists for the CDS/Honickman, Duke University 1st Book Prize in Photography 2014.http://firstbookprizephoto.com/hannah-kozak-2014-finalist/

And, this project make it to semi-finalists for the CDS/Honickman, Duke University 1st Book Prize in Photography, 2016.

Early this week I asked my mother what she does every night. She said “I pray to G-d to help me.” “To help me with happiness, I don’t know how to explain.” And then she said “The hardest part of my life is accepting things.” “I want to be like you, Hannah. I want to walk.”

My Mother’s Dolls part 3


My Mother’s Dolls part 2

My Mother’s Dolls part 2

This is Part Two of the series, My Mother’s Dolls. These photos are a continuation of the series: He Threw the Last Punch Too Hard, which began in December 2009. My mother is in a wheelchair, brain damaged from her second husband’s abuse. She cannot pick up the phone when she is feeling lonely to hear a familiar voice. Or take a walk in the neighborhood, listening to birds singing. Reading a book isn’t an option. She can’t reach out for a dog or cat to pet. Yet she manages to smile at the littlest things, like her dolls. Small reassuring beings, friends in quiet moments.

I have been a participant observer, documenting my mother’s nearly adult lifetime confinement to a nursing home after a brutal beating by her second husband.

I will continue to focus on the comfort objects that help my mother get through her day. These nurturing dolls are my mother’s friends, day and night.

Hannah_Kozak_My_Mother's_Dolls-1109

© hannah kozak

@ hannah kozak

Guatemalan doll

© hannah kozak

© hannah kozak

In emergency room

© hannah kozak

Dora and Hello Kitty

© hannah kozak

© hannah kozak

Dinner time

© hannah kozak

 © hannah kozak

My mother was having lunch. I walked into her room and saw her freshly made bed.

My Mother’s Dolls part 2


My Mother’s Dolls

My Mother’s Dolls

Forgiveness and Compassion

My mother’s birthday is around the corner, and I am ironing nametags onto the various stuffed animals I have chosen for her. I run the hot silver plate over the back of a stuffed grey and black kitty, sealing my mother’s name onto his back, making it hers. My mother loves her stuffed animals. They are her companions, keeping her company and bringing her comfort during the day and late at night.

My mother is in a wheelchair, brain damaged from her second husband’s abuse. She cannot pick up the phone when she is feeling lonely to hear a familiar voice. Or take a walk in the neighborhood, listening to birds singing. Reading a book isn’t an option. She can’t reach out for a dog or cat to pet. Yet she manages to smile at the littlest things, like her dolls. Small reassuring beings, friends in quiet moments.

I have been a participant observer, documenting my mother’s nearly adult lifetime confinement to a nursing home after a brutal beating by her second husband.

http://hannahkozak.com/he-threw-the-last-punch-too-har/

My mother is the longest living resident in her home for the aged. When she entered the home, we had run out of options. I understood her anger. I’d be pissed, too, if I ended up crippled, but the women taking care of her couldn’t handle her explosions from frustration. My mother was a passionate brunette from Guatemala who used to dance the Flamenco. My uncle told me men would throw their wallets at her. Today she is incapacitated to the point where she cannot walk, feed or clothe herself.

This is Part One of the series, My Mother’s Dolls.

These photos are a continuation of that series; He Threw the Last Punch Too Hard, which began in December 2009. I am focusing here on the comfort objects that allow my mother to get through the day, nurturing and loving dolls that stand in for the life she lost.

My mother's new dolls for Mother's Day 2014

My mother’s new dolls for Mother’s Day 2014

My mother in Guatemala.

My mother in Guatemala.

@ hannah kozak

Olivia, her favorite

@ hannah kozak

The Snowman

@ hannah kozak

@ hannah kozak

@ hannah kozak

@ hannah kozak

@ hannah kozak

Another favorite – doll I brought her from Antigua, Guatemala.

@ hannah kozak

@ hannah kozak

@ hannah kozak

@ hannah kozak

My mother and MJ Thriller doll

@ hannah kozak

@ hannah kozak

© hannah kozak

As a bittersweet sidenote, I was awarded the Julia Margaret Cameron Award, 6th Edition, 1st Prize – single Documentary photo from my series on my mother, He Threw the Last Punch Too Hard.

That project also made it to the finalists for the CDS/Honickman, Duke University 1st Book Prize in Photography 2014.

http://firstbookprizephoto.com/hannah-kozak-2014-finalist/

My Mother’s Dolls


3rd Biennial of Fine Art & Documentary Photography – Málaga, Spain

3rd Binnial at Heritage Municipal Museum in Málaga, Spain. 5th Edition of the Julia Margaret Cameron Award – Female Photographer of the Year, Hannah Kozak

The Grand opening of the 3rd Biennial at the beautiful Heritage Municipal Museum in Málaga, Spain. This is an international award sponsored by the Worldwide Photography Gala Awards. Five of my photographs from my Pain and Loneliness series were chosen to be on exhibition at the 3rd International Biennial of Fine Art and Documentary Photography. I was also given the honor of 1st prize documentary photo from the series He Threw the Last Punch Too Hard and 1st prize children’s category. Show opened on September 18th – and will run through November 9th, 2014 in the home city of Picasso.

Oliva, just like me, is directionally dysfunctional. Trying to find the Municipal Museum.

Oliva, just like me, is directionally dysfunctional. Trying to find the Municipal Museum.

Walking to the Municipal Museum in Málaga, Spain.

Walking to the Municipal Museum in Málaga, Spain.

I love the light in Málaga, Spain.

I love the light in Málaga, Spain.

3rd Bienal Internacional de Fotografía Artística & Documental

3rd Bienal Internacional de Fotografía Artística & Documental

Various photographers featured in the show.

Various photographers featured in the show.

Hannah Kozak & Julio Hardy. Julio was born in Argentina, studied in Berlin and lives in Málaga, Spain http://www.juliohardy.com

Hannah Kozak & Julio Hardy.
Julio was born in Argentina, studied in Berlin and lives in Málaga, Spain
http://www.juliohardy.com

Karmen Corak from Italy. www.facebook.com/karmen.corak

Karmen Corak from Italy. http://www.facebook.com/karmen.corak

Mishu Vass www.mushuvass.com Romania  Safe from Harm

Mishu Vass
http://www.mishuvass.com
Romania
Safe from Harm

Elena Retfalvi www.retfalvi.com #1 Who's afraid of Elfriede Jelinek 1 #2 Who's afraid of Elfriede Jelinet 2 #3 Who's afraid of Elfriede Jelinet 3

Elena Retfalvi
http://www.retfalvi.com
#1 Who’s afraid of Elfriede Jelinek 1
#2 Who’s afraid of Elfriede Jelinet 2
#3 Who’s afraid of Elfriede Jelinet 3

Ana Stewart www.galeriadagavea.com.br  Brazil Cinara da serrinha

Ana Stewart
http://www.galeriadagavea.com.br
Brazil
Cinara da serrinha

Honey Lazar www.honeylazar.com United States #1 When I Fall in Love it will be Forever #2 Tanya

Honey Lazar
http://www.honeylazar.com
United States
#1 When I Fall in Love it will be Forever
#2
Tanya

Linda Wright United States # 1 - # 10 America's Cup World Series, Naples, Italy

Linda Wright
United States
# 1 – # 10
America’s Cup World Series,
Naples, Italy

Hannah Kozak & Tory

Hannah Kozak & Tory

Olivia found her way!

Olivia found her way!

3rd Bienal de Fotgrafia Museo Del Patrimonio Municipal

3rd Bienal de Fotgrafia
Museo Del Patrimonio Municipal

Pain and Loneliness from Hannah Kozak- Female Photographer of the Year for Nudes

Pain and Loneliness from Hannah Kozak- Female Photographer of the Year for Nudes

3rd Binnial at Heritage Municipal Museum in Málaga, Spain. 5th Edition of the Julia Margaret Cameron Award – Female Photographer of the Year, Hannah Kozak


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